best jokes Donald Trump
best jokes Donald Trump
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are in a plane crash. Who survives? America.
If I had a penny for every Trump joke being made right now, I’d have a small loan of a million dollars.
Donald Trump may be the next President but the big winner is Melania Trump. Now she can call herself the First Lady instead of the Third Wife.
A young immigrant boy tells Mr. Trump he wants to be President when he grows up. “Are you stupid?” exclaimed Trump, “are you an idiot? Out of our mind? Are you retarded?” The kid calmly replied, “you know what, never mind, those are too many requirements.”
How is Donald Trump going to fulfill his promise to shut down the Department of Education? By renaming it Trump University.
What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, Charles Ponzi, and Kenneth Lay? The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
A swastika has been spray painted over Donald Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Law enforcement says that it’s impossible to tell if it was done by Trump’s opponents or his supporters.
How do you know when Donald Trump is talking to you? Cause you’re the only one hair!
What’s the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan? If Trump gets Alzheimer’s, his IQ will go up.
How is President Trump going to create middle-class jobs? By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
What nickname did President Trump give to his presidential airplane? Hair Force One!
What’s Donald Trump’s favorite nation? Discrimination.
What is Donald Trumps favorite song? ICE ICE Baby.
What do Trump’s hair and a string bikini have in common? They both barely cover a butthole.
Is it possible that we’ve all been groped by Donald J. Trump, but just didn’t feel it because of his tiny baby hands?
Donald Trump’s approval ratings have sunk to an all-time low. On the bright side for the President, he’s still polling #1 among Germans of the 1930s.
“After years of being banned, Adolf Hitler’s ‘Mein Kampf’ is headed back to German bookstores. The new edition has a foreword by Donald Trump.” ~ Conan O’Brien
Have you seen that Clint Eastwood film about Donald Trump? It’s called “Billion Dollar Cry Baby.”
Donald Trump has announced that now he’s been elected President he’s going to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese. He wants to make America great again.
Everybody knows Donald Trump is the most tremendous investor… in the laughing stock market.
Now that Donald Trump has been elected President, there’ll be hell toupée.
Donald Trump loves the “poorly educated” so much, that as President he promises that there will be more of them than ever.how can President Trump control our country when he can’t even control his hair?
“During a rally in Florida yesterday Donald Trump boasted about his plans for ISIS and said he will “be their worst nightmare.” Oh, wow, so he’s also running for president of ISIS?” ~ Seth Meyers
Donald Trump said Hillary Clinton was “disgusting” for taking a bathroom break during one of the Democratic debates. Trump, on the other hand, never has to go to the bathroom… the crap just comes straight out of his mouth.
Donald Trump is so privileged that the first job he ever had to apply for was president of the United States.
“Trump’s cabinet is like a dream team of people who have never heard MLK’s dream.” ~ Stephen Colbert
Donald Trump announced that he’s going to ban wind farms now he’s been elected. He really needs to keep his hair on.
Trump’s cabinet must be from IKEA… poor quality comes unglued easily, and it only took a few simple tools to assemble.
How many Donald Trump supporters does it take to change a light bulb? Look, we can change the light bulb. That I will tell you. We’re changing it, ok? And I understand what you’re saying, I hear it all the time. People call me and say “Is the light bulb really dead?”. That’s what they are asking me, its unbelievable. The light bulb is in big trouble, that I can tell you. But we are going to change it.
I’d make another political joke, but it would just end up being elected President.